Thursday, December 3, 2009

Ben and Carrie: The rewards of patience

Ben and Carrie's wedding is an example of a business deal gone all wrong, and two longtime friends who got it right.

Carrie and Ben have been BFFs since before that term existed. They met 10 years ago through their church, and with time grew close. As with any boy/girl friendship, there were a few people on both sides telling them they would be so perfect together — in this case, those people turned out to be right, but Ben and Carrie had a good reason to doubt them.

Risk. Carrie spent years earning a Master's in Business Administration, and she will gladly tell you that the fundamental principal of economics is to maximize profit while minimizing risk. And the friendship was working status-quo, yielding a profit of enjoyment for both without the complications of romance.

But love is a merciless negotiator, and it moved on Carrie's heart and mind aggressively. She found herself attracted to Ben. And trying to remind herself of the risk.

Love cornered her, and Carrie eventually downsized logic off the payroll. The friendship started changing, and it became Ben who started thinking about risk — because Carrie was winning his heart.

He made some mental budget cuts as well. About two years ago, they started dating.

The risks turned out to be real. About a year and a half ago, they broke up.

They fell back on the old business model, and became friends again. Yes, just like how it was before — not "but we're still friends" friends or Facebook friends. They called each other, they talked, they hung out, and it wasn't all that weird. The friendship was real.

But the attraction was, too. In the time off, they didn't date anyone else. They didn't really think about anyone else.

They started thinking about each other again. The friendship started feeling like it was supposed to be a means to a more profitable end again. The risks were real, but living without each other's love got really risky too.

If they ever fell out of love the first time around, they fell back in love again. I can't say "they got back together" — even though they weren't dating, they hadn't parted in 10 years.

And for Ben, Carrie had become gold — everything else was a slush fund. On Saturday, they maximized their profit.


  1. I like this. A great story.

  2. Ronnie, you are awesome. Thank you for capturing the most perfect event that I have ever attended. Mimi Brei